Though there are pro’s and con’s, this is being written by someone who has been in a successful LDR and got through to the other side. I also know many other people who are also in very strong LDR’s or are now married and living together.

Let’s get down to it.

I’m not going to lie, being in a long distance relationship had it’s really good and really really sucky points, but I will tell you this – at no point of the relationship did we ever have any doubts.

To put things into perspective a little, here’s a brief backstory about how Shane and I met, I created a series of 7 comics about it, you can click [here] to read them!

Going back to LDR’s, and if you’re seriously considering it, I’m going to break it down and discuss the pros and cons of being in one and what sort of obstacles you might come across if you’re considering it. Please keep in mind this is from our perspective, and no two relationships are ever truly the same.

 

 

Pro’s:

  • YOU’RE IN A RELATIONSHIP! You found someone you care about and who loves you back, and that’s pretty freaking awesome!
  • You have a pen pal (no this isn’t a joke), seriously, we LOVED receiving letters and packages from each other, knowing it came from a part of a world they exist in.
  • It will test you. This may not sound like a pro, but if you can both wait for each other, and fight back at all of those people who will tell you it won’t work, you know you’ve got a keeper!
  • Absence makes the heart grow fonder. You really will learn the meaning of this, and definitely don’t see it as a bad thing. Being in a LDR will make you value one another even more when you finally do get to snuggle, kiss, and hold hands.
  • When you reach the end and can finally close the distance, it sure is rewarding! Never forget what it was like to live apart, always have that reminder, because it will only make you both appreciate each other that bit more when you realise you made it.

Con’s:

  • It hurts, not being to have the physical contact is torture, especially when you see during video calls your partner is upset.
  • If you’re not careful, arguments can be extremely destructive. Some of us can be bitter when they are angry, and if you don’t pick up calls to resolve issues, this can dissolve your relationship fast.
  • People can lack faith in LDR, you may hear people tell you “but you haven’t met them yet”, “it’s not a real  relationships”, “you can’t love someone if you’ve not properly been with them”. To heck with those people, only YOU know how you feel, so don’t be pressured, but you will probably have to expect it…
  • Lack of trust will create tension. Please please PLEASE keep up communication with each other, be honest and open about who you’re spending time with, and expect some jealousy (I was jealous if I couldn’t spend time with Shane!), but you must learn to trust each other that there is faith, love and loyalty between you both.
  • You might miss being with your friends. Being in a LDR can take up a lot of time, because you can only call each other up with an internet connection and that means a lot of unsocial hours. Luckily for Shane and I, we are recluses! So this wasn’t an issue for us 😀 but if you are social creatures, keep this in mind, make time for each other but also be understanding for friendship time too!

If you have both discussed this and decided that it IS the right decision for you, then CONGRATULATIONS to you both!!! I wish you all the happiness in the world!! But now comes the fun part 😛 what to do next. Why not take a look at my other post where I give suggestions for activities, making time for friends and other points you might not have considered yet, please click the link below for MOAR!

“LDR’s – You’re in one, so what now?”